I used your watch again today. I remember how happy you were when we purchased that online and how excited you were when it was finally delivered to your office. You said you sounded petty cause it was just a cheap watch but because it was something that you bought for yourself after a long time, it made you really happy.
I remember seeing this/that watch on your wrist, fitting your perfectly slim arms and fingers – those fingers that would hold mine, those same fingers that wiped my tears away that day you decided to break things off between the two of us.
Yes, it’s another trigger night. I’m such a fucktard, crying here again. I just wished like five minutes ago that it wouldn’t be but hey, when memories of us trigger, the tears fall automatically – it’s like I almost have no control of myself anymore.
I need to get a grip. I need to fix myself. I am such a mess right now, and it’s fucking crazy.